Confused
by sassy-squatch
Summary: It's seventh year and Lily Evans has begun to develop some unwanted feelings towards the infamous James Potter. What happens when Lily is paired with James for a potions project and Sirius devises a plan to bring them closer? Will she ignore her feelings for James or embrace them? J&L one shot


It started out like any other day at Hogwarts. Things had been getting pretty boring lately. However there was one thing that was different about today. Today, I couldn't stop thinking about James Potter. Yes, the infamous James Potter who has been pining after me since first year. Crazy right? I know I'm still having trouble trying to figure it out and deal with these new confusing thoughts about Mr Potter. I mean, all the girls of Hogwarts fangirl over him, I mean you can practically see them drooling over him from the other side of the great hall (even the bloody first years) so it was normal right? Psh yeah, normal. I don't even know what's normal anymore. I mean, I used to HATE quidditch. With a passion might I ad. Now I never miss a single game. Ever. Anyways back to my James Potter problem – I think I just had an epiphany. Maybe James Potter is the reason I now am obsessed with the outrageous wizarding game they call "Quidditch". Gah I'm so confused. Boys. They're a real nuisance.

So back to the main point I was trying to make, things have been weird lately. And on this particular day, things got even weirder than I thought possible. Yeah, I'm quite shocked myself, I mean how could things get weirder then me pining after THE James Potter who I have spent my whole schooling life rejecting his proclamations of undying love for me? It all started on my way to Potions which happened to consist of James Potter and his three friends who go by the title "The Marauders". I could hear them laughing from across the hall. Without my permission, my stupid mouth started to smile against my own will. Just because you and James have started to get along doesn't mean you have feelings for him. You're barely even friends with that boy. I do not have feelings for James Potter. I do not have feelings for James Potter. I – "OOMPH" have feelings for James Potter... Wait What? I slowly looked up to realise I had walked into something solid interrupting my little rant. I hadn't already made it to Potions had I? Ahh well anyways the "solid thing" I had walked into was none other than, yep you guessed it, James Potter. Just my luck. I stumbled as I hit his chest… his very… muscular chest and his arms… his very… muscular arms caught me.  
"You right there Evans?" James asked with a smirk on his face that looked as if he was very satisfied with himself. God it was cute how the side of his mouth slowly tugged up on one side when he did that… FOCUS LILY JAMES POTTER IS NOT CUTE IN ANY WAY SHAPE OR FORM. Although he does have really nice eyes…

"Yeah. I'm Fine. I mean… I was just… OH NEVER MIND" I shoved past him and plonked myself into the nearest desk crossing my arms over my chest. Very childish Lily. I felt my cheeks begin to turn red. I stared down at my books whilst James went and took his seat beside the also infamous Sirius Black. I felt someone sit down in the chair next to me.

"Hey Lils, wow why are you so red for?" Marlene asked me. Of course she HAD to ask. Merlin, this is so not going to be my day.

"Don't even ask." Marlene just shrugged her shoulders and began to unpack her things as a very dazed looking professor Slughorn entered the room shushing the class into silence. Everyone except James and Sirius who were whispering and snickering. Slughorn was mumbling to himself and was looking much disorganised. Tsk tsk what has gotten into that man lately? As Professor Slughorn was not so discretely trying to organise his things, I felt someone staring holes into the back of my head. I subtly turned my head around expecting to find James' deep hazel eyes staring at me but instead found Sirius black's stormy grey ones. What a surprising turn of events… He was staring at me with the most mischievous expression I have ever seen in my life. Oh merlin oh merlin oh merlin what is he planning to do? This isn't going to be good. Last time Sirius Black pulled one of his "great" ideas some poor second years ended up with green skin for a week. Let's just say I am extremely terrified right now.

"Alright, evening students. Ms Evans! Your essay on Murtlap Essence was absolutely fantastic. I can't wait to see what you write for your next assignment" I felt my cheeks growing warm for the second time that day as Professor Slughorn ONCE AGAIN effortlessly succeeded to embarrass me in front of the WHOLE class. This was becoming a much too common occurrence. It must be stopped.

"Today you will begin your new assignment. Your task is to, in pairs, make a sleeping draught." At the mention of pairs there was a chorus of whispered "YES"s which suddenly turned to groans and whispered "NO"s as Slughorn added "I will now allocate your partners". Of course we wouldn't get to pick our partners. Bloody Slughorn, first the essay now this. Can't I ever win?

"McKinnon you're with Black" Marlene sighed and went to sit by Sirius giving me a look that said wish me luck.

"Mr Lupin, you're with Ms Meadows" What was with Slughorn and not ever just using everyone's first names? As Slughorn continued to partner up the students, my mind again turned back to the topic of James Potter. Even if I did like him – which I don't, it wouldn't be that bad. I mean he has seemed to grow up a lot over the summer break. I mean, he's still one of the most immature people I have ever met but he can be funny – when he's not a complete idiot – and I do always see him standing up for students who are being bullied by Rozier and his fellow Slytherins. I have to admire his bravery and his passion for standing up for what he believes in. It's one of his few redeeming qualities. My thoughts were put to an end as I heard Slughorn call out my name.

"Evans, hmm I'm going to put you with Mr Potter. Merlin knows he needs to work with someone who has actually been paying attention."

"Sorry what was that Sluggie? I wasn't paying attention" The class began to laugh and James made his way over to me. I suddenly felt very nervous, what is happening to me? Oh fabulous now my palms are all sweaty… great. It was infuriating how confident and calm he looked whilst I was desperately trying not have a heart attack and get my thoughts in check. As he sat down, much to my dismay, I noticed he smelt amazing. I know that may sound very weird and creepy but MERLIN he smelt good like the forest, and spring and new parchment and – "Lily? Why are you staring at me like that?" Oh bother I didn't realise I was staring.

"I uh you had something on your face." I said stupidly.

"Wh-"

"Don't worry its gone now." He looked at me with a quizzical look on his face as if he was trying to figure something out. He looked adorable with his head tilted to the side and his face all scrunched up in concentration.

"If I didn't know any better I would say I'm making you nervous Evans." He stated and proceeded to open his potions textbook. Pft making me nervous?

"You wish Potter" I mumbled quietly under my breath. Again he looked at me with one of his eyebrows raised as if he was studying me. Thankfully he didn't say anything else relating to what I was currently feeling about his presence. He was sitting so close to me. Oh so very close. This was so unfair. Why did he have to make this so difficult? I made a mental note to be mad at him about this later. Not that he would know _why _I am mad at him but still. That doesn't matter.

Making the potion with James was… surprisingly easy and fun. I found myself laughing so hard that my stomach hurt and he had this huge, dopey grin spread across his face. We talked about pointless things and such, I admit, it was nice. We both reached for the Nettle which was the next ingredient for our potion at the same time causing our arms to brush against each other. I got a sudden tingling sensation where he touched me and jerked my hand back. Both of us pretending nothing happened. I may or may not have turned slightly pink…

That was when IT happened. Sirius walked past us with that mischievous look on his face and before I realised what was happening, he "accidentally" knocked our cauldron over spilling its contents all over James and I.

"PADFOOT YOU CLUMSY SOD. Watch where you're going!" James shouted. He was trying to look mad but it was obvious he was trying hard not to laugh. I on the other hand was fuming. I didn't say anything though.

"Ahh sorry Prongs. Sorry Lily. I'm just SO clumsy!" Sirius just stood there smirking. Yep. He did that on purpose.

"Sort your shit out Padfoot." James said. All I was thinking was thank Merlin this potion isn't toxic.

"Professor Slughorn? May James and I be excused to go tidy ourselves up?" I asked Slughorn.

"Ahh why yes, yes of course. Off you go." He stuttered. I think he needs to get more sleep or something. He's a strange one he is. I saw Sirius sit back down next to Marlene and caught them both snickering. I shot them the death glare and they stopped abruptly. I would get my revenge.

On the way to the bathroom, James grabbed my hand and pulled me in the wrong direction.

"What are you doing? The nearest bathrooms are that way!" I said pointing in the other direction.

"Just trust me I know a shortcut." He continued dragging me the wrong way and didn't let go of my hand. I didn't try and make him.

"If this is a trick or some kind of prank I am not going to be impressed." Then he stopped abruptly causing me to crash into him for the second time that day. That was when he opened a painting in the wall revealing a passage.

"How did you find this?" I asked curious.

"My secret" he winked at me. I shook my head in exasperation.

"Alright then lead the way Mr secretive." Still holding my hand he led me down the long passage and sure enough, we arrived at the girl's bathroom and once again James surprised me. He came into the girl's bathroom as well.

"What are you doing?" I asked raising one of my eyebrows quite unsuccessfully. James let out a laugh.

"Here I know a spell to help clean the potion off your clothes." Just as he said, the spell cleaned my clothes. He then did the same to himself.

"Thanks." I said. As James washed his face I began to fix my hair. Just as I was in the middle of tying it into a ponytail James' hand caught my wrist.

"Why not wear it down today? It looks pretty down." He said.

"Oh okay." So I left my hair down. It shouldn't have mattered what he thought, but I couldn't stop thinking about how he said I looked pretty. And I wanted to look pretty for him. Ah I'm turning into one of those mushy washy girly girls! Darn it, why didn't I care more?!

It was a long walk back to potions and even though we mostly walked in silence, it wasn't awkward. It was a nice, comfortable silence. The kind of comfortable silence you only feel when you really know someone. James stopped in front of the classroom and turned towards me.

"Hey James, thanks for today. I actually had fun." I said and to both mine and James' surprise it wasn't a lie. It was the truth. I did have fun.

"Yeah me too." James said. His cheeks began turning a brilliant shade of red. I had never seen James Potter blush before but when I saw it, he had never been more attractive. I wanted to see that blush again. He reached up and wiped a smudge of leftover potion from my cheek, his hand trailing across my cheek to tuck a lock of hair behind my ear. I didn't know what to say so instead I kissed him. It was just a soft chaste kiss at first but it soon turned hungry and desperate. Without hesitating his mouth crashed into mine and I let out a soft moan as I tangled my fingers in his hair. I pushed my body against his and felt his heart beating just as fast as mine was. I stopped and looked at him, our bodies still pressed together. The way he was looking at me sent shivers down my spine. In a good way. I wanted so desperately to kiss him again but no the universe wasn't on my side. Class ended and I jumped away from him, cheeks flushed both from the heat of the kiss and embarrassment of how I had acted. Before I could leave James asked me for the hundredth time;

"Hey Lily, do you want to go to Hogsmeade with me?" He looked so hopeful and for the first time I didn't say no. I couldn't say no, not after what just happened.

"Maybe." I told him with a grin slowly creeping onto my face.

"Is that a yes?" He asked.

"It's a maybe" I said as I turned away to leave. James just stood there smiling and shouted to me as I was leaving "I bet that was the best kiss you've ever had!" I just shook my head and chuckled to myself. Cocky bastard. I didn't say anything but he was right. It was the best kiss I have ever had and yes I do like James Potter. And no! I'm not afraid to admit it.

I guess a single potions lesson **_can_** change your life. Thanks Sluggy! And I suppose I should thank Sirius as well. Merlin what a weird day.

**Please Read and Review! This is my first ever fanfiction so no hate but I would love for some advice so I can improve :) Hope you liked it and I'm sorry if it's terrible! **

**xx**


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